March 18, 2004

‘laptop’

My company organized a lucky draw for some charity event and a mail has been sent out to inform everyone about it. There was only one particular part that caught my attention :

1st prize : Perodua Kelisa
2nd prize : Honda Motorcycle
3rd prize : Lap Top computer

My eyes were fixed at the 3rd prize. Lap top. Since when do people still refer portable computers as ‘lap tops’? As far as I can remember, people used to refer portable computers as ‘lap tops’ because some bunch of idiots felt that it is so cool to put a portable computer on their lap (for some strange reason). So, if those bunch of people happen to like the idea of putting a portable computer on top of their dog’s head, it’ll be pretty much known as a ‘canine head top’ instead.

I can’t help but wonder, what if this becomes the universal way of naming things. It would be disastrous, man. Rob would be born to the name of ‘decomposed corpse’, or perhaps ‘leprechaun pervert’. Or he could be named after the place he was conceived — ‘the backseat of a garbage truck’. Cars would be known as ‘road tops’. And Barney would be known as the ‘purple lardass lizard who was born with merged teeth’. Goddamn, hahah.

Anyway, the word ‘lap top’ should be made obsolete now, lest that this may mislead the public that it is ok to put your portable computer on your lap. Seriously, it is not (not ok). Modern portable computers are so powerful nowadays, that it would constitute a hazard to put the thing in contact with your skin for a prolonged period. At 40 over degrees on the hottest point, you’d get skin irritation out of the computer more than anything else. (Seriously, the only thing that takes the rightful title ‘lap top’ should only be those strippers from men’s club).

So, why do we still call our portable computers ‘lap top’? Wouldn’t it be better to simply call it a portable computer? Or a notebook? Why a low tech name for a high tech machine? What a strange world.

michaelooi  | thoughts  | 

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