December 19, 2003

new office cubicle

I received a memo yesterday – that I am required to move my desk across the office into another cubicle. Reason? The director wants my place for his new office.

Well, it’s a good thing, as my current place is quite crampy and hot. So without objection, I started to move my stuff over to the new cubicle since late yesterday. The new cube is nice, very spacious, and is located at a very nice corner with plenty of privacy.

But there is one thing about my new cube that bugs me — it is located right next to Jude. Now what about Jude? She’s scary, man. I can’t accurately describe much about her except that she’s got this fondness to come near and talk to me. The thing is, she makes me feel uncomfortable.

I’ve always averted from talking too much to her before this. I’d steer myself away whenever I see her in front. I’d go ‘oh-ok-yeah’ to shorten every conversation. But somehow, she has always been able to catch me up. Uggh.

Anyway, the idea of me moving next to her is a venison moving next to a colony of hyenas. It’s almost pronounced like a death sentence. When she saw me move my stuff in, she kinda excitedly stood up and exclaimed “You moved next to my cube! Hyuk hyuk hyuk hyuk!”. I swear that’s exactly how she laughs. Freakishly freakish.

I am imagining the worst now. Like when I am busy typing something important (like an entry for my blog)… I’d suddenly notice some acrid smelling transparent goo dripping from above… and then when I look up to check out what the fuck was that — I will see Jude salivating from above peeking at me – like that nasty alien in the movie ‘Alien’. And that’s when she would cue in her “hyuk hyuk hyuk hyuk” trademark giggle.

Fuck. I think I’ll need to apply for permission from the management to install some high voltage barb wire along the perimeter of my office cube. Then, probably keep a couple of pitbulls guarding the passageway, and hire a 24-7 security guard armed with some nasty hole punchers. Maybe lace a few bouncing betty’s underneath the carpet as well… just to keep her away…

michaelooi  | work shit  | 

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